The "Perfect" Mom
Updated: Feb 10
Written By: Stephanie Lalonde
Does anybody out there know of “the perfect mom”? Are you a perfect mom? Is your mother a perfect mom? Or dare I say it…. Is your mother in law a “perfect mom”? I am here to tell you that I am nowhere near a perfect mom, but that`s okay. Truth be told I do not think a “perfect mom” exists, but in the day and age of social media and over thinking, sometimes we think they are out there.
Today I spent hours and hours cleaning my house and doing laundry, only to feel like it still didn`t look clean. While I was cleaning, I noticed my beautiful collection of untouched cookbooks staring at me from my dusty bookshelf. This led to me feeling guilty about not having made something different and exciting for dinner lately. Which led to me going to the grocery store and spending two hundred dollars on fresh vegetables and lean meat. Do you want to know what my kids ate for dinner? Frozen pizza. After all that fuss about making a nice meal I was so tired from all the cleaning and laundry and shopping and just general life that I didn`t have the energy to make a home cooked meal. And like every other tired mom out there I felt guilty about it.
Now I`m not actually that hard on myself about the frozen pizza. Truth be told it`s been served a lot lately and it will be served again. But sometimes I find myself watching other moms around me and let`s be honest, these perfect Instagram moms, and I doubt my parenting skills. Silly? YES! Ten thousand percent, but we all do it.
Lunches for school are a great example, I have read many blogs and recipe books on “go-to lunches” for kids, easy weeknight meals etc etc. I have also seen the gourmet lunches that some of these moms are sending to school, and that is amazing. But my little ones are more than content with some dry crackers and a couple cucumbers. I got so sick of throwing out full lunches after school I gave up on anything fancy.
When social media became a daily presence in our lives, parenting and life in general became that much harder. It gave us access into every moment of people’s lives. The perfect 1st birthday party set up, the over the top birth announcements and gender reveals. The mom who manages to have the perfect body and hair every day while juggling three kids. The mom who makes the perfect gourmet meal every night for dinner. It is extremely hard not to compare ourselves and try to keep up. But the truth is none of it is real. Nobody is perfect and what we see from the outside is only scratching the surface of somebody`s life. Our kids don`t need to know that we can pick the perfect filter for our selfies, nor do they need a portrait mode picture of every moment in their life. They just need to know we love them, it is that simple.
I know that I will always be the mom who has to ask the other moms when dance starts, when a form is due at school, or if they also drink baileys in their coffee most days. And that’s okay. I know that I am not perfect, and I know that as much as some moms may look perfect, none of us are. At the end of the day we are all just mommies who love our babies so much that we are constantly trying to be better for them.
So, let`s stop guilting ourselves over frozen pizza dinners and recognize that we are kicking butt at this mom thing.