Updated: Dec 3, 2019
Written By: Vanessa Marshall
HA! I want everyone reading this that thinks this is possible to just take that idea crumple it in a tiny little ball and throw it in the trash!
I had an amazing week of work where I do eyelash extensions and hair extensions out of my home. I crushed it in business this week. I was well over my normal client count for the week, too many to be honest but man did it feel good to have a revolving door of awesome clients leaving my home feeling more beautiful and confident than when they came in.
My #momlife that week sucked! My daughter watched way too much TV, spent a lot of time playing happily alone on the floor and eating things like PB & J and KD basically all week. Mom guilt was strong that week but having no care for my daughter and working from home and having an insane week, I had to do what I had to do. And I made it work. There was ZERO balance whatsoever to that week. I was 100% deep in the throes of business owner/operator and did what I could to keep my kid happy, fed and feeling loved.
Could I have done more... probably, am I beating myself up... maybe a little, but it was a week, ONE week where my attention had to be on business and with not having a nanny and school hadn't started yet. I set up shop in my kitchen next to the play room and handled it! Thank God my child still naps 2-3 hours a day or I probably would have ... well I would have handled it I’m sure but I am so grateful for naps!
Just a few weeks before that, I rocked mom life. We were going on long walks twice a day with a stop at the park along the way, we ate all the veggies and fruit and quality meals, interactive play, a few play dates and cuddles on the couch. I had someone helping me on days I had to work so that my daughter wasn’t playing alone. I was a great mom!! At the same time I fully ignored clients (sorry guys), forgot to order some supplies that were needed and had a week of feeling like I was never going to catch up with work.
These crazy weeks whether a mom week or a work week don't end. This September I had another crazy work week! I am so grateful for all my clients and for being as busy as I am but my daughter also started JK during my crazy work week. During her first week I was staying with her for the first hour or more for two days to help her EA and teacher learn some of her needs and answer any questions they may have. My daughter is special needs with some serious health concerns, so as you can imagine when she started school it was terrifying for me, but I know she loves it. So, between work, my daughter starting JK and the stress that all of that brought, I already knew my house would be a disaster. I had zero time for my husband, dinner was not made and if it was, well sorry to those that have to eat it.
My point here is, STOP TRYING TO FIND BALANCE. The search for balance leaves so many of us feeling defeated, guilty, ashamed...I could go on. We are only one person. Our goals are going to change constantly, our children will have daily, weekly, yearly changes in their needs, our relationships with friends, family and even our husbands are going to suffer sometimes, that’s life. Sh*t happens. The ability to go with the flow really helps me handle all this (and an awesome husband who lets me ignore him most days and picks up the slack when needed) but I know there are so many out there that are super schedule and routine oriented, please try to give yourself some grace and understanding that you are doing the very best you can in all the situations you are faced with.
We are all doing the very best we can!
Balance, HA, just give it the finger and keep kicking ass mamas!!